DUNKED IN THE DEEP

This short starts off in Bortch's apartment room, where we are hearing on his radio a newscaster making the news breaking annoncement:

"A piece of data bit, that secret files recently stolen are still missing. A hot suspect is being sought. And results are expected with in a very short time. It is believed that foreign elements are at work. Since the missing documents have not been found."

The broadcast ends where we hear a teletype machine typing in the background.

We now see Bortch with a devious look on his face where he is hiding two of the film copies of the secret film in tubes inside of watermelons. He is now walking over to his radio and is shutting it off as he is holding paper drafts of the secret documents.

BORTCH: (As he has a demented look on his face as he is shutting off the radio and is walking over to a wood burning stove and is evily burning the paper drafts of the documents and is saying): "Fools, they will never find these documents!"

BORTCH: (In a very demented mood says as he is looking at the final film strip before inserting into the final film tube and the final watermelon): "On dees fillum, I have record the secret of those documents for my country, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha,!"

Bortch is now finishing putting the last of the film tubes inside of the watermelons in a very devious state as we now hear knocking on his door. We now see Bortch with a scared and demented look on his face as he is putting his hand on a gat that is inside of his suit jacket pocket and is getting ready to answer the door.

BORTCH to the DOOR: (With a look of devilment on his face and says in a evil tone still holding onto his gat): "Who's there?"

MOE, LARRY, and SHEMP to BORTCH: (As they are in a happy mood and reply in unison): "It's us, your neighbours!"

Bortch is now happily opening his door to let Larry, Shemp, and Moe in, thinking that they have no recollection of him being the wanted foreign spy.

We now see Larry, Moe, and Shemp happily and proudly walking into Bortch's apartment room dressed in Dutch Men costumes and carrying handbills.

LARRY to BORTCH: (As Larry is smiling at Bortch and has a happy tone of voice says): "Hello!"

MOE to BORTCH: (As Moe is walking in with a smile on his face and mischief in his voice): "Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!"

We now see Shemp, Moe, and Larry standing proudly in Bortch's apartment room showing off their costumes in pride.

LARRY to BORTCH: (As Larry is smiling proudly says): "How do you like it Bortch?"

BORTCH to SHEMP, LARRY, and MOE: (As Bortch is smiling and has a mischievous look on his face as he is using hand gestures to support his statement): "But, what are you dressed like this?"

MOE to BORTCH: (As Moe is smiling at Bortch and is answering in a happy tone of voice): "We got a job!"

LARRY to BORTCH: (In a very happy mood says to Bortch): "We're passing out these handbills!"

Larry is now showing Bortch one of the handbills that reads as follows:

Old Holland Cheese
IN FIVE DELICIOUS FLAVOURS...

AMSTERDAM

ROTTERDAM

BEAVER DAM

BOULDER DAM

and GIVA DAM

Only On Sale At:
Open Air Markets

BORTCH to SHEMP, LARRY, and MOE: (As Bortch has now finished reading the handbill and is smiling at them in mischievous state says): "Ha, ha, that's good!"

SHEMP to BORTCH: (With a smile on his face and a happy tone of voice): "We'll bring you a sample tonight!"

BORTCH to LARRY, SHEMP, and MOE: (As Bortch is looking at them in a sad mood and has a sad and devious sounding voice): "Tonight, tonight, I'll be on the ocean, my 'wisa' has expired, they're throwing me out of the country. I have to go back to my native land."

SHEMP to BORTCH: (As we now see Moe, Larry, and Shemp standing there with sad looks on their faces about Bortch leaving): "That's too bad!"

BORTCH to LARRY, MOE, and SHEMP: (In a mischievous tone of voice): "Boys, I 'wansh' you to do me a favour, I am having too much luggage to take to the ship. I want you boys to carry these watermelons for me. In an hour you will meet me at Pier 7, the boat will be there!"

MOE to BORTCH: (In a very happy tone of voice as Larry and Shemp are also standing there by Moe): "Okay, Pal!"

BORTCH to MOE, SHEMP, and LARRY: (In a state of friendship and in a happy tone of voice says): "Now, we will have a farewell drink."

We now see Moe, Larry, and Shemp running behind Bortch is a happy state.

SHEMP, LARRY, and MOE to BORTCH: (With smiles o their face and happy voices say in unison): "Oh boy, a drink, oh boy, oh boy, oh boy, a little drink now."

We now see Bortch going over to his liquour cabinet and getting out a libations bottle and four glasses. Larry, Shemp, and Moe are standing by Bortch rubbing their hands and smiling in a state of glee.

BORTCH to MOE, SHEMP, and LARRY: (As Bortch is happily opening the libations bottle and is getting prepared to pour it. Shemp, Larry, and Moe are standing there rubbing their hands in glee and smiling as Bortch says): "This you will love, Pre-War!"

With Shemp, Larry, and Moe standing there watching Bortch in a gleeful state. Bortch is now removing the cork from the libations bottle and he is pouring a liquour that is so potent, that the portion that is spilling on the table is smoking and removing the varnish off of the table.

As Bortch is pouring the drinks we see Moe and Larry looking at their drinks and then at one another with worried looks on their faces.

BORTCH to MOE, SHEMP, and LARRY: (As he is corking up the bottle and smiling happily at them says): "Ah,ha, ha, good!"

SHEMP to BORTCH: (As Shemp is toasting with Bortch and clinking glasses together says happily): "Here's how."

BORTCH to MOE and LARRY: (As Larry and Moe have worried looks on their faces and they go to toast with Bortch): "Ah, yah!"

MOE and LARRY to BORTCH: (With scared looks on their faces and in a scared tone of voice): "Ha, woo, ha!"

Moe and Larry now have their drinks in their hands and are looking at them in wonderment. They are now watching Shemp with worried looks on their faces as Shemp is happily enjoying his drink.

We now see Shemp as he has now finished his drink. Shemp is now jumping up and down in pain saying, 'eeb, eeb, eeb, eeb, eeb, eeb, eeb, eeb, eeb, eeb, eeb, eeb, eeb, eeb, eeb, eeb, eeb, eeb, eeb, eeb.' We now see smoke coming from Shemp's mouth. His tie is spining like an airplane propeller and he has smoke coming from the top of his head and out of his ears. His hat is now bouncing up and down and Shemp has a very painful look on his face.

Moe and Larry have decided to throw their drinks away, after the saw what it did to poor Shemp. Moe and Larry are now tossing their drinks over their shoulders and it has landed on the wall covering behind them and has removed it from the wall. Larry and Moe are now looking at the wall with worried looks on their faces as they flinch back as they are seeing the wall covering coming off of the wall.

LARRY to MOE: (As Larry is looking at his glass and then at Moe in a total state of worry and scaredness is now whispering to Moe): "Pre-War?"

MOE to LARRY: (As Moe is also looking at his glass and at Larry in a worried state says): "Next One!"

Moe and Larry have now taken a final sniff from their glasses and have jumped back in pain with worried looks on their faces.

We are now at the boat dock where Shemp, Larry, and Moe are to meet Bortch.

We are now inside the boat on one of the lower decks where we see a sign on the wall that reads:

"PIER - 7" "BERTH - C"

Plus we see a crate of TNT sticks with the following warning on it:

DANGER
DYNAMITE CAPS
DO NOT
JAR, SHAKE, STRIKE OR DROP
HIGHLY EXPLOSIVE
DANGER

We now see Shemp, Larry, and Moe entering Pier 7 with the watermelons and are looking for Bortch.

MOE to SHEMP and LARRY: (As Moe is looking around the ship and says to Larry and Shemp in a happy voice): "This is Pier 7, I wonder where Bortch is?

SHEMP to MOE: (In a state of mischief says): "Oh, we're early. My dogs are barkin,' I'm gonna take a rest."

LARRY to SHEMP: (With a tired look on his face and tiredness in his voice says): "Me two!"

MOE to SHEMP and LARRY: (With a tired look on his face and a tired sounding voice says): "Me three!"

We now see Larry and Shemp setting down their watermelons and sitting down on the crate of TNT sticks.

Shemp and Larry have now sat down on the TNT crate, (that they do not know is TNT), and are removing their shoes and rubbing their sore feet and ar saying in painful unison: "Ah, ah, ah, ah, ow-ow-ow-ow'"

We now see Moe who is sitting down on a wooden bench and has taken off his hat and is swatting at a fly that is bothering him. As Moe is sitting ther with his eyes closed and is trying to rest he is constantly being bothered by that pesky little fly.

We are now on another wooden crate that is just above Moe's head, which happens to be the home of two chickens. The hen is cackling happily as she has just laid an egg. The cackle fruit has now fallen out of the chicken crate and has landed in Moe's right hand. Moe is still sitting their with his eyes shut and is slapping crazily at that pesky little fly with his left hand. Moe has now gone to hit that pesky little critter with his right hand and has woken up abruptly with a dazed look on his face as he has now cracked the cackle fruit on his face. Moe is now in a slight mad state says 'banishk' as he is taking out his handkerchief and wiping the cackle fruit from his face.

We are now back on Shemp and Larry who are still resting on the TNT crate.

SHEMP to LARRY: (With a happy look on his face and a happy tone of voice says): "Want a Brazil nut?"

LARRY to SHEMP: (Responds in a happy state): "Yeah, I'll take one!"

We are now on the crate of TNT sticks were Shemp and Larry are trying feriously to crack their Brazil nuts with their teeth. Larry is now trying to crack his Brazil nut now with his hands.

We now see Shemp standing up and has set his Brazil nut down on top of the TNT crate and has found a metal piping tube and is beating at the Brazil nut in a very mad state.

LARRY to SHEMP: (With a look of mischief on his face and worry in his voice as Larry is shouting to Shemp): "Wait a minute, wait a minute, I'll show you how to do it, hold that!"

We now see Larry with the piping tube in his hand while Shemp is holding onto the Brazil nut. Larry is now getting ready to whack the Brazil nut with the piping tube but he hits Shemp's hand really hard instead.

Shemp is now yelling loudly in pain, 'ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh. Shemp has now taken the piping tube from Larry and is cracking Larry's coconut with it.

LARRY to SHEMP: (With an apologetic look on his face and an apologetic tone of voice says to Shemp): "I'm sorry, Shemp."

Larry has a hurtful look on his face and thorough madness in his voice as he has taken the piping tube from Shemp and throws it intending to hit Shemp with it but misses Shemp and hits Moe with it.

LARRY to SHEMP: (In a total state of madness): "Why, you imbecile."

We now see Moe who is still sitting on his wooden bench wiping cackle fruit off of him as he now has a hurtful and dazed look on his face from being hit with the piping tube.

MOE to SHEMP and LARRY: (As Moe is rubbing his sore head and has a mad look on his face and is shouting at Shemp and Larry madly): "Why you!"

We now see Larry and Shemp rushing over to Moe with apologetic looks on their faces and apologetic tones of voices.

SHEMP to MOE: (In a very apologetic manner): "I'm sorry Moe, I didn't mean it."

LARRY to MOE: (Also in a very apologetic manner): "It was an accident!"

SHEMP and LARRY to MOE: (Both are apologizing in unison): "Yes, Moe we didn't mean it!"

MOE to SHEMP and LARRY: (Totally and thoroughly mad shouts): "Why you!"

Moe is now in a very thorough mad state as he is throwing the piping tube at Shemp and Larry. Larry and Shemp have ducked to void being hit with the piping tube and Moe has now ignited the crate of TNT sticks.

We now see Larry, Moe, and Shemp getting knocked over and covered with crashing debris from the impact of the crate of TNT blowing up. They are now getting up in a dazed state and are staggering a tad to regain their balance.

We now see Bortch opening an inner door which happens to be the one where he is suppose to meet with Larry, Shemp, and Moe.

LARRY, SHEMP, and MOE to BORTCH: (As they have now seen Bortch and are waving their hands in happiness and have happy looks on their faces as they shout in happy unison to Bortch): "Hi Bortch!"

BORTCH to SHEMP, LARRY, and MOE: (As he is looking at them in a scared and worried manner): "Ssssssh!"

We now see Larry, Shemp, and Moe taking off their hats and brushing dirt off of themselves as they are happily approaching Bortch with the watermelons.

LARRY to SHEMP and MOE: (In a happy state says): "Come on!"

Larry, Shemp, and Moe are now entering in the area where Bortch is.

LARRY to BORTCH: (With a smile on his face and glee in his voice says): "Hello, Bortch!"

BORTCH to SHEMP, MOE, and LARRY: (As Bortch is greeting them in a happy manner with a look of devilment on his face says): "Hello boys, I'm glad you're here!"

MOE to BORTCH: (As Moe is still brushing dirt off of himself and has a look of wonderment on his face): "Oh, we had a tough time out there!"

LARRY to MOE: (As Larry has a look of dazement on his face and a slight mad voice says): "Yeh, hey brush my back off will ya?"

MOE to LARRY: (With a mad look on his face and madness in his voice says): "I'll brush you off!"

As Larry, Moe, and Shemp are brushing dirt off of each others backs we see Bortch with a demented look on his face as he is glaring over at Shemp, Larry, and Moe as he is locking the door.

MOE to SHEMP and LARRY: (As Moe is shouting at them madly says): "Wait a minute, wait a minute!"

As Moe is getting ready to break his watermelon over Shemp's head we see Bortch approaching them in a state of panic.

BORTCH to LARRY, MOE, and SHEMP: (In a full blown state of panic): "Oh, wait, oh, no. I'll take the melons boys!"

MOE to BORTCH: (As we also see Larry and Shemp handing over their watermelons to Bortch as Moe says in a calm voice): "Okay, easy!"

SHEMP to BORTCH: (In a calm state): "Here we are."

SHEMP to MOE and LARRY: (As Shemp has now taken a deep breath and has a happy look on his face says): "Ah, I love the briney deep, it does somethin' to me."

LARRY to SHEMP: (As Larry has a look of happiness on his face and mischief in his voice as he snaps his fingers): "Hey, 'NUMBER FOUR IN THE BLUE BOOK!"

LARRY and SHEMP: (In unison as they are marching and doing a soft shoe dance style in place with happy and mischievous looks on their faces):
"We're off to see the sea, to see what we can see, yes to see what we can see!"

MOE to SHEMP and LARRY: (As Moe is now interrupting the happily singing and dancing Shemp and Larry, Moe asks in a state of wonderment): "Hey, hey, hey, what's this all about?"

LARRY to MOE: (In a state of mischief and a questionable tone of voice says): "Don't you know?, we're known as "THE FISH MARKET DUET!"

MOE to LARRY: (As he is looking at Larry with a mad look on his face and madness in his voice says): "THE FISH MARKET DUET?"

SHEMP to MOE: (As Shemp has a look of mischief on his face and a mischievous tone of voice says) "Yeah, we sing for the 'HALIBUT'!"

Larry, Shemp, and Moe are now laughing mischievously together. Moe is now mad at Shemp and Larry as Moe takes his fists and hits Shemp on the nose quickly twice and then Moe reaches back of himself and gives Larry a quick bonk on his forehead.

MOE to SHEMP and LARRY: (In a full blown state of madness shouts at them): "What's the matter with you guys? Clean yourselves up here come on!"

We are now on Bortch who has put the watermelons in a wooden crate and has a look of devilment on his face.

We now hear the boat whistle blowing as Bortch is now approaching Larry, Shemp, and Moe.

BORTCH to MOE, LARRY, and SHEMP: (As Bortch is shaking Larry's hand in friendship and good-bye says): "Well boys, I, I, gotta be going!"

LARRY to BORTCH: (As Larry is still shaking Bortch's hand and says to Bortch in a happy tone of voice): "So long Bortch!"

As Bortch is saying his final farewells to Larry, Shemp, and Moe the boat is beginning to depart from the dock.

MOE to LARRY and SHEMP: (As Moe states in panic): "Hey, the boat's movin'!"

LARRY to SHEMP and MOE: (In a total state of panic says): "We better get out of here!"

SHEMP to LARRY and MOE: (Also in a state of panic): "Yeah!"

We now see Larry, Moe, and Shemp running to the exit door in a total state of panic to get out but to only find it locked.

The boat is now starting to depart from the dock as Shemp, Larry, and Moe are running around in a panic state trying to exit.

BORTCH to LARRY, SHEMP, and MOE: (As Bortch has now approached Shemp, Larry, and Moe and says to them in a mischief and mean voice): "It's no use getting excited, I got a secret for you. I am a stowaway, and you are stowaways."

We now see Larry, Shemp, and Moe laughing hysterically with Bortch about the fact that they all are stowaways.

LARRY to SHEMP: (Still laughing hysterically as Larry is pointing a finger at Shemp and then himself says): "He's a stowaway, and we're stowaways."

We now see Moe no longer laughing when he has realized what Bortch has just said and is now once again in a state of panic.

MOE to SHEMP and LARRY: (As Moe is using hand gestures to support worry and has a worried and panic look on his face says): "What are we laughing for?"

We are now seeing the ship. It is a dark, dreary, and eerie moonless night..

We now see Bortch sitting at a wooden crate slicing off some slices of Summer Sausage off a five pound chub. Moe, Shemp, and Larry are standing around with looks of happiness on their faces hoping to get a slice of Summer Sausage.

MOE to SHEMP, LARRY, and BORTCH: (As Moe is rubbing his hands in happiness and is smiling): "Boy, now we really get somethin' good to eat!"

BORTCH to SHEMP, LARRY, and MOE: (In a selfish and self centred voice and mood says to Larry, Moe, and Shemp): "I'm sorry boys, I only have enough for me."

Moe has now given Larry a look of wonderment while Shemp is standing there with a dazed look on his face. Despite of what Bortch has said, Larry has now tried to get a slice of Summer Sausage, but pulls his hand back quickly when Bortch chops at it with his knife.

LARRY to BORTCH: (As Larry has a mad look on his face and shouts at Bortch in a state of madness says): "Ah, have a heart and give us a piece will ya?"

BORTCH to LARRY: (As Bortch has a demented look on his face and madness in his voice shouts back at Larry in a selfish manner): "I don't have enough!"

Bortch is now slapping the wooden crated for the first time hard as we see a slice of Summer Sausage flying into Shemp's mouth.

BORTCH to MOE and LARRY: (As Bortch is still being very selfish and shouting madly): "Now, leave me alone, don't you understand the 'Engles', I told you I don't have enough, now shut up!"

Bortch has now for the second time hit the wooden crate hard as we see a slice of Summer Sausage go flying into Moe's mouth.

BORTCH to LARRY, MOE, and SHEMP: (As Bortch is still being very selfish and self centred as he is looking at Shemp and is shouting madly): "And I mean shut up. I'm telling you for the last time, shut up. I'm gonna beat your heads in. I'll cut your throats from ear to ear and don't bother me anymore. Go away somewhere, I'm starving. You're keeping me from eating. Let me alone, and don't interfere with my appetite. Leave me alone. Drop dead!"

As Bortch is selfishly shouting at Larry, Shemp, and Moe he has now slapped the wooden crate hard for the third time and once again we see another slice of Summer Sausage go flying into Larry's mouth.

We now see Shemp who has now found some metal knobs off of water pipes and has taken three of them off and is placing them on the wooden crate as replacements for the sausage slices replacements hoping Bortch will not notice the missing slices.

SHEMP to BORTCH: (As Shemp is mischievously placing the water piping knobs on the table says): "Ah, don't get excited, go on and eat."

Shemp is now brushing off his hand as he is giving Moe and Larry a look and wink of mischief.

We now see Shemp standing there with his arms crossed and a look of devilment on his face as he is slightly laughing as Bortch is now eating the metal knobs. Shemp has now flitched a bit as he has seen Bortch happily eat one of the metal knobs.

BORTCH to LARRY, MOE, and SHEMP: (As Bortch is patting his stomach and has a happy look on his face as we hear metal jingling inside of Bortch's stomach says): "Ha, ah, good!"

We now see Bortch using hand gestures in a state of wonder as he has now heard the metal jingle and is giving Shemp, Moe, and Larry looks of I don't care.

We now see Shemp running over to Larry's side in a state of worry and Larry, Moe, and Shemp are watching in wonderment at Bortch eating happily the metal knobs.

BORTCH to SHEMP, LARRY, and MOE: (In a state of mischief as he is picking up the last metal knob and is putting seasoning on it says): "I might as well put one in garlic."

We now see Moe giving Shemp and Larry a wink of mischief and has a look of mischief on his face as Moe is now shaking black pepper in his hand and is getting ready to blow it on Bortch's face.

LARRY to BORTCH: (In a total state of mischief as he taps Bortch on his shoulder and Moe is now in the process of blowing the black pepper in Bortch's face says): "Hey, Bortch!"

Moe has now blown the black pepper in Bortch's face as Bortch is now sneezing loudly in an uncontrollable frenzic state. We now see Shemp, Moe, and Larry with looks of happy mischief on their faces as they are now reaching over for the remaining portion of the Summer Sausage chub.

Moe has now happily and mischievously shaken both Larry's and Shemp's hand in success.

We now see Bortch standing up and still sneezing in a horrible frenzic state as Shemp is now picking up the Summer Sausage.

SHEMP to LARRY and MOE: (As Shemp now has the sausage chub happily in his hands and is slinging it over his shoulder): "Right face!"

SHEMP, LARRY, and MOE: (In a happy manner and with the sausage chub said as they are happily marching away): "Hep, hep, hep, hep, hep, hep, hep, hep, hep, hep, hep, hep, hup, hup, hup, hup, hup, hup, hup, hup, hup, hup, hup, hup!"

We now see the boat again on the rough, dark, cold, dreary, and spooky waters on an eerie moonless night as it is rocking wildly to and fro.

We are now on mid-deck where we see Larry, Shemp, and Moe standing there together with happy looks on their faces as they are enjoying their chunks of Summer Sausage.

SHEMP to MOE and LARRY: (As Shemp is happily eating and has a big smile on his face says): "Oh, delicious, if I only had some whipped créme."

LARRY to SHEMP and MOE: (As Larry is standing there with a look of sickness on his face and has his hand on his stomach): "Oh, I wish I hadn't eaten so much of this, I don't feel so good!"

MOE to LARRY and SHEMP: (Also not feeling up to par says): "I wish I hadn't eaten so much either, I wish this boat would stop wobblin!"

SHEMP to LARRY and MOE: (As Shemp first looks at Moe and then at Larry with a look of mischief on his face as he is taking the chunks of Summer Sausage from both Larry and Moe says): "Oh, softies, can't take it, ey, ha, ha, ha, ha. I'll eat it, don't worry about them."

We now see Shemp happily chowing down on all three sections of sausage at one time while Larry and Moe are standing there watching Shemp with really sick looks on their faces.

SHEMP to MOE and LARRY: (As Shemp is still happily enjoying the Summer Sausage and is saying): "Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, give me the high seas, give me the salty waters."

We now see poor Larry and Moe running to sit down next to the wall in a total state of not feeling up to par as they are giving the happy sausage chewing Shemp awful looks of pain.

SHEMP: (In a state of mischief as he is still chowing down on the sausage says): "Oh, boy, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, they can't take it!"

We now see poor Shemp just after he made his announcement now joining Larry and Moe in the ranks of not feeling up to par.

Shemp is now holding the three chubs of Summer Sausage as he has now gone and put his forehead against the boat wall as Larry and Moe are sitting on the boats deck. All three of them are now not feeling up to par.

Shemp is now turning around and groaning in sickness as he is taking his fingers and prying open his eyes to try and see as he is groaning painfully. Shemp has now taken another look of the sausage chubs and flinches and groans in a full blown state of sickness, 'ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh.' Shemp has now dropped the sausage into a pail of water that is labelled: "FIRE ONLY!"

We are now on Moe who is sitting on the ships deck with a look of painful sickness on his face as he is feeling something spilling on the top of his head. Moe is now looking up at the groaning Shemp with his hand on his mouth. At first Moe thinks that Shemp has 'redistributed his biscuits' on him.

Moe is now getting up in a total state of madness as he has found out that it was only water that Shemp spilled on him.

MOE to SHEMP: (As Moe is now standing up and giving Shemp a hard smack on his face and shouts loudly to Shemp); "What's the idea? spilling water on me. Go on beat it!"

Shemp is now walking by a porthole window and is now opening it and taking a deep breath of the fresh outdoor, salty water air. And he is now being splashed by some of the water. Shemp has now closed the window partially. Shemp is now kneeling down on the boat dock and is sneaking up to take another peak out of the window hoping this time not to be sprayed by the water. He is now waving his hand in front of the window and is not getting sprayed by the water. He now quickly stood up and then he quickly ducked down again and still no water spray. He has now once again stood up in front of the window, took another deep breath of the fresh, salty air and has now again been hit in the puss by the salty water. Shemp is now totally soaked as he is now closing up the porthole window in a state of full madness.

We are now below deck where we see Moe and Larry in full dress including their shoes snoaring loudly laying on two wooden crates.

We now see Shemp who is also getting ready to retire for the night. He has found himself a hammock and is now tieing one end to a metal pole and the other end to the boat wall.

SHEMP: (In a total state of happiness as he is talking to himself says): "Suckers, let them sleep on hard boxes, I'll swing myself to sleep!"

Shemp is now attempting to get into his hammock for the first time as he has crawled up on it and has fallen off of it on the other side crashing hard to the floor.

SHEMP to the HAMMOCK: (As he is yelling at it in a mad state): "Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, how do you like that!"

Shemp in now on his second attempt to get into his hammock. Once again he has crawled on top of it and again goes crashing onto the floor hard and says, 'Hey, eee, eee, eee, eee' in pain.

We are now once again on Moe and Larry who are totally fast asleep happily and snoaring loudly on their wooden crates.

Shemp is now on his third and final attempt at getting into his hammock. Shemp has now gotten himself a trash reciprocal that is hooked to a board that is on wheels and he has rolled it over to his hammock to use it to help himself get into the hammock.

We now see a quick blip of Moe and Larry once again snoaring loudly and happily on their wooden crates.

We are now back on Shemp who is now cozied in on his hammock. SHEMP SAYS: "I made it, and now for a little peace and quiet!"

Shemp is now relaxed on his hammock where he is now lighting up a cigarette and has thrown the lit match into the trash reciprocal full of dry papers and has now set them ablaze. Shemp has now taken one drag off of his cigarette and has also thrown it in the can of burning papers.

Shemp is now fast asleep and is swinging to and fro in a state of happiness on his hammock saying, 'Ah, ya, na! Ah, ya, na! Ah, ya, na! Ah, ya, na!'

We are now back on the boat in it's cold, dark, dreary, eerie and rough waters on a totally moonless night as it is rocking frantically to and fro from the roughness of the waters.

We are now below deck again where we see Shemp rocking to and fro happily asleep on his hammock and is saying, 'eeb, eeb, eeb, eeb, eeb, eeb, eeb, eeb, eeb, eeb, eeb eeb'. (He has no recollection of the burning trash reciprocal that is now rocking to and fro under his hammock). We now see Shemp's hammock strings with the ignited trash reciprocal underneath them setting them ablaze. Shemp is still happily sleeping in his hammock as he is saying, 'eeb, eeb, eeb, eeb, eeb, eeb, eeb, eeb, eeb, eeb, eeb, eeb!'

The ignited trash reciprocal has now set Shemp's entire hammock ablaze, sending Shemp crashing down right on top of the blazing can. Shemp has now woken up in a start and a state of pain as we hear him shouting loudly, 'Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow.' He is now sitting on the fire on top of the ignited can. Shemp has now jumped off of the burning can in a frantic panic.

We are now back on Moe and Larry who are fast asleep on the top level of the wooden crates. Shemp is now fast asleep in the lower portion of the wooden crates.

It is now morning and Moe and Larry are now waking up and sitting up and stretching as Shemp is still fast asleep in the lower part of the wooden crates.

Moe and Larry are now waking up and sitting up and stretching saying, 'Ah, ooh, ah, ooh, ooh, ey!'

MOE and LARRY: (In total unison as they are sitting up, smiling, and stretching are saying): "Oh, what a night's sleep." (We now see Moe and Larry hitting each other in their faces and knocking one another out of the bed and onto their sides of the floor).

MOE to LARRY: (As Moe is getting up off of the floor and is shouting at Larry over the bed in madness): "What's the matter with you, crazy?"

As Moe and Larry are getting up from the floor we are hearing Shemp saying, 'eeb, eeb, eeb, eeb, eeb, eeb, eeb, eeb, eeb, eeb, eeb, eeb,' as he is still fast asleep in his portion of the wooden crates.

Moe and Larry are now looking for Shemp frantically and have found him under the bed ware on his portion of the wooden crates happily sound asleep saying, 'eeb, eeb, eeb, eeb, eeb, eeb, eeb, eeb, beeb, beeb, beeb, beeb, beeb, beeb, beeb, beeb.' Moe and Larry are now looking at the happy, sleeping Shemp in madness. We now see Moe reaching over and giving Shemp a good, hard, hit right in the stomach.

MOE to SHEMP: (Moe is now shouting loudly to Shemp in madness): "Get up, come on!"

SHEMP to LARRY and MOE: (As Shemp is in a state of dazement and is shaking his head says): "Oh, why did you wake me, fellas, why didn't you let me sleep? So I wouldnit know how hungry I am."

MOE to SHEMP and LARRY: (As Moe has a look of pain on his face says): "He's right!"

LARRY to SHEMP and MOE: (With a carrying and mischievous look on his face and a mischievous tone of voice says as he is rubbing his hands): "Hey, why don't we eat them watermelons?"

Moe is now dragging Shemp out of the bed by his hair in agreement to Larry's remark about eating the watermelons.

MOE to SHEMP and LARRY: (In a mad tone of voice): "Come on, let's go!"

We now see Bortch who is fast asleep and guarding the watermelons. He has one in each hand and his using the third one as a pillow.

We now see Shemp, Larry, and Moe sneaking up to Bortch's bed quietly and are taking the watermelons from him. Larry is now quietly removing the watermelon from Bortch's right hand. Moe is helping himself to the one from his left hand. Larry is now handing his watermelon to Shemp as he is now trying quietly to remove the one from under Bortch's head.

Larry has now pushed the one that Bortch was using as a pillow out with his head as Larry's head is now Bortch's pillow.

We now see Shemp and Moe entering into another room in the lower portion of the boat. Moe is now looking for someway to break open the watermelon.

MOE to SHEMP: (As Moe is pointing a finger at the floor and is laughing in a state of mischief says): "Ha, ha, look?"

SHEMP to MOE: (As Shemp is now bending over looking): "I don't see nothing!"

Shemp is still bent over as Moe is cracking open one of the watermelons on Shemp's coconut.

Shemp is now jumping up in a total state of pain and is yelling frantically and loudly as he is rubbing his sore head, 'Ah, ah, ah, ooh, ooh, ooh'!

MOE to SHEMP: (As Moe is sticking his hand inside of one of the watermelon halves and says in a state of mischief): "Ooh, and big seeds!"

Shemp is now watching Moe in a state of dismay as Moe is pulling out a piece of the watermelon.

MOE to SHEMP: (As Moe has brought out the film tube not knowing what is is says): "Oh, a prize!"

MOE to SHEMP: (As Moe is in a state of wonder as Shemp is looking over Moe's shoulder in a state of dazement): "What's this?"

Moe has now opened the film tube and has discovered the film is the 'Missing Secret Documents.'

MOE to SHEMP: (As Moe has a look of worry on his face as Shemp is also looking in a state of worry): "Hey, get the other melons!"

We now see Shemp and Moe each with a watermelon in their hands as they are now finding the other two film tubes.

We are now back on Bortch who is still fast asleep as Larry is still Bortch's pillow.

Moe and Shemp are now looking at the other film strips and are verifying that they are deffinately the 'Missing Secret Documents.'

MOE to SHEMP: (With a look of devilment on his face says): "Un, hunh!"

SHEMP to MOE: (Shemp says in reply to Moe): "Ooh, ooh."

We are now back on the sleeping Bortch and the Larry Pillow. Larry has now moved slightly which has now caused Bortch to wake up abruptly. Bortch is now looking frantically at his hands as he has now discovered that the watermelons are now missing.

BORTCH: (In a quiet state of panic says): "The melons," (Bortch is now reaching behind him and is touching Larry's head says). "That melon is here!"

Bortch is now reaching a bit farther down Larry's head and has now discovered Larry's bugle and that it is not a watermelon that he is sleeping on. Bortch has now looked behind himself and has discovered it was Larry.

LARRY to BORTCH: (As Larry is still lying under Bortch's head and is giving Bortch a mischievous look and says as Larry is waving at him in a mischief tone of voice): "Hi!"

MOE to SHEMP: (In a serious tone of voice): "Bortch is the spy that stole those government documents, we'll turn that baby over to the authorities!"

BORTCH to LARRY: (In a mad tone of voice and with a demented look on his face and still holding onto his shiv as he is squeezing Larry's neck and Larry is getting ready to yell in pain as Bortch says): "Ssssssh!"

We now see the furiously mad Bortch getting out of the bed with his knife in his hand as he is madly approaching Moe and Shemp. Bortch is now standing behind Moe and Shemp with his shiv posed and is strangling Larry and has a look of dementedness on his face.

MOE to SHEMP: (In a very serious mood as he is handing Shemp the film tubes): "Now, you hold this film for safe keeping, until we do away with that spy!"

BORTCH to MOE: (As Bortch is standing behind Moe says with a demented look on his face and a demented tone of voice): "That's, what you think!"

We now see Shemp putting the film tubes in his suit jacket pocket.

MOE to BORTCH: (Not realizing he is talking to Bortch says to him in a state of mischief): "That's what I said!"

MOE to BORTCH: (Absolutely not knowing at the moment that he is talking to Bortch as Moe is turning around and says in a friendly manner and is using hand gestures): "Hello!"

Bortch is now getting read to use his shiv on Moe as Moe has now realized that it was Bortch that he was talking to, says in a state of panic, "Hun, hunh!"

As Bortch is now getting ready to hit Moe with his shiv we see Larry socking Bortch in his stomach.

LARRY to SHEMP and MOE: (In a horrible state of panic shouts loudly): 'R - U - N!"

We now see Larry and Moe running for safety in one direction as poor Shemp is being chased after by the demented shiv swinging Bortch.

BORTCH to SHEMP: (As Bortch has a demented look on his face and is chasing after Shemp has now cornered Shemp shouts loudly): "Give me dat fillum!"

BORTCH to SHEMP: (As Shemp is now standing there in a total state of horrified panic as Bortch is wildly swinging his shiv at Shemp and is shouting in a devious voice): "Give me dat fillum, give me dat fillum, I got you now, you rat!"

We are now on Moe and Larry who have found a pulley and Moe is throwing it at Bortch.

BORTCH to SHEMP: (Just as Bortch is saying to Shemp): "Let me have it!"

We are now seeing Bortch getting hit in the head with the pulley.

MOE to LARRY: (As Moe is shaking Larry's hand in happiness says): "That took care of him!"

We now see the pulley swinging back and hitting Moe and Larry on their coconuts. Moe and Larry are now falling to the floor totally knocked out with looks of dazement and pain on their faces as they are seeing 'stars' and hearing cookoo birds chirping.

Bortch is now sitting on one of the wooden crates in a state of dazement as he is also rubbing his head in pain.

We now see Shemp who is standing in one of the walkways and is teasing Bortch.

SHEMP to BORTCH: (With a look of mischief on his face and mischief in his voice says): "Yoo-whoo, nay-nay!" (Shemp has now put his thumbs on his ears and is waving his hands to and fro).

We now see the demented shiv swinging Bortch grunting in madness as he is chasing after Shemp.

BORTCH to SHEMP: (In a total state of devilment and a demented look on his face says): "Now, I get you!"

We now see a merry chase betwixt Shemp and Bortch with Shemp in a full state of mischief. Shemp is running down the hallways in all different directions with the demented Bortch chasing after him.

SHEMP to BORTCH: (As Shemp is looking at Bortch who is running in a different direction looking for Shemp as Shemp once again has his thumbs on his ears and then flopping his hands to and fro says in mischief): "Nay, nay!"

Bortch is now fully mad and in a deep demented state as he is now turning around to chase after Shemp who has turned down a different corridor to void being caught by Bortch.

Shemp is now once again running in all different directions saying 'Nay, nay,' as he is being chased by Bortch. Shemp is going in one direction while Bortch is chasing after Shemp. Just as Bortch has thought he has caught up to Shemp, Shemp is now running in a different directions to a different location of the boat super teasing the now very demented knife swinging Bortch.

Shemp has now slowed down his pace to a fast walk as Bortch is chasing after him and is not able to catch up with Shemp. As Bortch is running in all directions like a 'chicken with his head cut off,' we now see Shemp standing up next to a stack of wooden crates. Bortch is stilling running in a state of madness and frenzy as Shemp is standing their watching Bortch in a state of fun and mischief.

Bortch has now come to the point in his running frenzy of total exhaustion as he has now stopped to take a breather as Bortch is putting a hand on a stack of wooden crates and is resting. Shemp has now mischievously snuck up behind Bortch and has given him a swift, hard kick in his bumm.

SHEMP to BORTCH: (As Shemp has now approached Bortch in a full state of mischief and has administered an eyepoke to Bortch as Shemp is once again putting his thumbs to his ears and is flopping his hands to and fro says): "Nay, nay!"

Bortch is now staggering a tad to regain his balance as Shemp is madly running for his life.

BORTCH to SHEMP: (As Bortch is still swinging his shiv and has a demented look on his face and devilish tone of voice says): "Why you bildge rat, I will kill you!

We now see Shemp running in a horrible state of panic as Shemp is leaping over a bunch of wooden crates to escape the very mad Bortch.

BORTCH to SHEMP: (As Bortch has now caught up with Shemp and is in a full state dementedness is shouting at Shemp): "Give me dat fillum!, Give me dat fillum!, or I kill you!"

We are now on Shemp who is looking down at his feet and has now noticed that he has stepped into two of the watermelons and is running in one direction while the demented Bortch is chasing after Shemp in another direction.

SHEMP to BORTCH: (After Shemp has been chased by the demented Bortch several times around some wooden crates shouts as Shemp is putting up his hand in a gesture to stop says): "No, don't!"

Bortch has not heeded to Shemp's cry of help as Shemp is now running away still wearing the watermelons away from the demented Bortch.

Moe and Larry are now coming too as they are shaking their heads and are getting up a bit dazed.

BORTCH to SHEMP: (As Bortch is pointing a finger at Shemp and is shouting at Shemp in a total devilish state): "You, give me dat fillum!"

SHEMP to BORTCH: (As Shemp is shouting loudly in a state of madness): "You, keep away from me."

Shemp has now kicked off one of the watermelons that was intended to hit Bortch, but Bortch has now ducked and the watermelon has now hit Larry, causing Larry to once again fall down with a hurt look on his face.

MOE to LARRY: (As Moe is patting Larry on his face trying to bring hmi too says): "Hey, kid!"

SHEMP to BORTCH: (As Shemp is now thoroughly disgusted at Bortch and is getting ready to fling the other watermelon says): "I'll brain ya!"

SHEMP to BORTCH: (As Shemp has now kicked off the other watermelon and has hit Bortch in his coconut and Shemp is now looking at Bortch in a state of happiness and glee in his voice says as Bortch is staggering a bit to regain his balance): "BULLS EYE', ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!"

BORTCH to SHEMP: (In a state beyond dementedness as Bortch is wiping watermelon off of his face shouts to Shemp): "Why, you!"

We are now on Larry and Moe who have looks of real madness on their faces as Moe is once again taking hold of the pulley.

MOE to the PULLEY: (In a wicked voice says as he kisses the pulley and is now flinging it): "Do your stuff baby!"

Moe has now tossed the pulley as Bortch has now ducked and poor Shemp is now being hit in the coconut with it. Shemp now has a very hurtful look his face as he is being knocked out.

The pulley is now swinging back and Moe sees it coming and shouts in panic, 'W - H - O - A'! and has ducked. Poor Larry did not see it coming and is once again getting hit in the head with it. Larry is falling to the ground again as he is once again seeing 'stars' and hearing cookoo birds chirping.

MOE to the PULLEY: (As Moe is now standing up in a furious mood and is grabbing the pulley and shouts in thorough madness): "Why, you back biter, I'll take you in myself!"

Moe is now approaching Bortch with the pulley in his hand. Bortch is now searching every pocket of the knocked out Shemp's suit jacket for the fillum.

Moe has now approached Bortch with the pulley in his hand as Moe is tapping Bortch gently on his shoulder.

MOE to BORTCH: (In a really mad and mischievous mood says): "Mr. Bortch!"

BORTCH to MOE: (As Bortch is now turning around to see what Moe wants says in demented voice): "Yes!"

We now see poor Shemp leaning next to a couple of petroleum drums and is still totally knocked out while Moe is hitting Bortch hard on his head with the pulley.

Bortch is now staggering a bit as he is now once again seeing 'stars', and hearing cookoo birds chirp.

END OF THE SHORT:

Moe is now running for some rope and is now hog tieing up the spy Bortch's feet.

SHEMP to MOE: (As Shemp has regained total consciousness says to Moe in a state of happiness): "You got him, nice work Moe!"

MOE to SHEMP: (In a really serious mood says): "We'll turn this bird over to the authorities at the first port. See if we're near land!"

SHEMP to MOE: (As Shemp is saluting Moe and bringing down his hand as Shemp is now hitting Moe hard on his coconut says): "Aih, aih, captain!"

MOE to SHEMP: (In a mad state as he has now kicked Shemp hard in his bumm): "Get out of here!"

We now see Shemp walking away from Moe and is now approaching the porthole window again.

SHEMP to the PORTHOLE WINDOW: (As Shemp is now ducking below in a precautionary state says): "Oh, no, not again!"

Shemp is now bent down on his knees as he is waving his hand to and fro over the open porthole window. Shemp is now standing up and is shading his eyes as he is peeking through the window.

THE SHORT FADES OUT:

With Shemp totally covered in mud. He is now wiping it off of his face as he is happily shouting as he is continuing smacking his face fast and furious in total glee as he is smiling from ear to ear. 'L-A-N-D,! 'L-A-N-D, 'L-A-N-D'!