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[ <- Transcripts List ] [ PURE FEUD (1934) ]

Transcribed By: Moron4392
Date Added: 2009-06-27

"PURE FEUD:"  "SAMUEL HORWITZ" SOLO SHORT:  RELEASED ON: APRIL 21, 1934:


CAST MEMBERS NAMES AND THEIR ROLES:

EDGAR BERGEN      MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE
EDGAR BERGEN     CHARLIE McCARTHY
VICKI CUMMINGS     MISS APPLETREE
SAMUEL HORWITZ  CLEM McCARTHY
VALERIE BERGERE  MA McCARTHY
JOSEPH FIELDS       McCARTHY


This short opens on a really lovely Summer's afternoon, the sun is shinning high in a beautiful blue cloudless skye.  We are now seeing a beautiful horse drawn carriage pulling into a really rough looking mountain setting town.  There are several dilapidated Hillbilly shacks without windows or paint, the doors are rotting off of their hinges, plus the wood is also in a deep state of rot and the shacks are leaning profousiously on their foundations.

CARRIAGE DRIVER to HIS HORSE:  (As we are now seeing the Driver bringing the carriage to a hault):  "Whoa, Tom!"

The Carriage Driver is now holding his whip as he is now looking at Mr. Edgar Albert Appletree with a dazed look on his face as we see Mr. Appletree looking back at the Driver with a mad look on his face.  Plus we see in the back of the carriage with a dumbfounded look on her face, Miss Appletree, Edgar's sister.

CARRIAGE DRIVER to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As the Driver is now taking his whip and is pointing at one of the beat out Hillbilly shanties and is saying in a low and stammering voice):  "There's you cabin, Mr., enh, Mr. ......?"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to the CARRIAGE DRIVER:  (As he is looking at the Carriage Driver with a mean look and is saying in a mean but yet polite tone of voice):  "Appletree, the name is still Appletree!"

CARRIAGE DRIVER to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As he is looking at him with a perplexed look on his face and is using a mischievous tone of voice):  "I'll remember that!"

We now see Mr. Appletree and his sister disembarking from the carriage.

CARRIAGE DRIVER to MISS APPLETREE:  (As he is looking at her with a carrying look on his face as he is using a carrying tone of voice):  "Now, Miss, I hope you find everything all right in the cabin.  If you don't, just let me know!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to the CARRIAGE DRIVER:  (As we see Mr. Appletree standing by the carriage with a worried look on his face as he is saying in a serious tone of voice):  "Why, you better be careful, you know my sister isn't use to this primitive life......"

MISS APPLETREE to HER BROTHER EDGAR:  (As she is now looking at him with a puzzled look on her face as she has now interupted him and is saying to him in a mad tone of voice):  "Well, I'm sure everything will be all right.  Now, I think I'm going in and tidy up a bit, and you Edgar, do a little exploring until dinner time."

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to HIS SISTER, MISS APPLETREE:  (As she is now going to the shantie and he is looking at her with a look of dismay on his face as he is now taking their luggage cases off of the carriage and says to her in a perplexed tone of voice):  "I'll do that!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to the CARRIAGE DRIVER:  (As Mr. Appletree is holding one of the luggage cases and has a contented look on his face as he is saying to the Carriage Driver in a really pleased and contented voice):  "Oh, this is a mighty pretty place you have here!"

CARRIAGE DRIVER to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As the Carriage Driver is still behind Tom and is getting his reins ready to exit says to him with a happy look on his face and is using a happy tone of voice):  "Oh, yes it is!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to the CARRIAGE DRIVER:  (As he is looking at the Carriage Driver with a dazed look on his face and is using a worried tone of voice):  "I hope it's quiet and peaceful, you know I'm down here on my doctor's ordures, 'Nerves'."

CARRIAGE DRIVER to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As the Carriage Driver is sitting there leaning on the back seat of the carriage and is looking at him with a carrying look on his face as he is saying to him in a worried tone of voice):  "Oh, everything's quiet and peaceful, I......"

We now see the Carriage Driver spit over the side of the carriage as our quiet and serne atmosphere is now being interupted by shotgun fire as a feud is now in progress betwixt the McCarthy's and the Jenkins's.

We now see the Carriage Driver high tailing it off of the carriage and is running for cover  in one of the Hillbilly shanties as Mr. Edgar Albert Appletree is now high tailing it for cover in his own shantie as the feuding is now at full tilt.

CARRIAGE DRIVER to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As he is shouting at him in a really panicking tone of voice):  "Run for it, hide, take cover, take cover!"

MR. Edgar Albert Appletree has now come back out of his shantie and is now slowly looking up and over some brush shrubry as he is kneeling there with a really scared and panicking look on his face as he has now come to the realization that the place he came to for peace and quiet, a little rest and relaxation is no longer peaceful.


INTRODUCING CHARLIE McCARTHY:  {EDGAR BERGEN WAS A PROFESSIONAL VENTRILOQUIST AND CHARLIE McCARTHY WAS HIS "SON"}: 


CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is now talking to him, as of now not knowing his name, is saying to him in a voice of mischief):  "Aaaah, some fun, hunh?  Some fireworks, man!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As he is also at the moment, talking to Charlie also not knowing his name is now looking at Charlie with a questionable look on his face as he is saying to Charlie in a worried and questionable tone of voice):  "I beg your pardon?"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is now looking at him with a look of wonderment on his face as he is saying to him in a mischievous tone of voice):  "Hunh, what's this?"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree now has a really wondering look on his face as he is now asking Charlie in a dazed and questionable tone of voice):  "Aaaah, what is all this rumpus about?"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is looking at Mr. Appletree with a dazed look on his face as he is saying to Mr. Appletree in a questionable tone of voice):  "Aaaah, what?"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is now totally confused about what is going on is now asking Charlie in a questionable and confused tone of voice):  "What are you shooting?"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie now has a mischievous look on his face and is answering Mr. Appletree in a really mischievous tone of voice):  "Well, umm, umm, I'm shootin' Jenkins!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is now looking at Charlie eyes to eyes and with a really mad look on his face and is now shouting at Charlie in a slightly mad and questionable tone of voice):  "Jenkins, what are Jenkins, birds?"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is now looking at Mr. Appletree with a wide eyed look of mischief and is saying to him in a mischievous tone of voice):  "No, they're our neighbours."

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is now so totally confused about what is going on and has a really worried look on his face as he is saying to Charlie in a confused tone of voice):  "Neighbours?"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie now has a really mischievous look on his face and is saying to Mr. Appletree in a really happy and mischievous tone of voice):  "YES!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree now has a look of hurt on his face and is saying to Charlie in a hurtful and worried tone of voice):  "My goodness, that's, that's a feud!"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is now looking at Mr. Appletree with a really proud look on his face and is saying to him in a proud tone of voice):  "Enh, enh, enh, that's right, that's right!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree now has a worried look on his face and is saying in a worried tone of voice):  "I think that's awful!"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie now has a look of sadness on his face as he is saying in a low and sad tone of voice):  "YES!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is now looking at Charlie with a really sad and worried look on his face as he is saying to Charlie in a really hurtful tone of voice):  "Why, how long has this been going on?"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is now leaning his head to his left as he is looking at Mr. Appletree with a puzzled look on his face as he is saying to Mr. Appletree in a proud tone of voice):  "Well, all on for now on a twenty years!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is now looking at Charlie with a gazzed look on his face as he is saying in a questionable tone of voice to Charlie):  "Is that so?"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is now looking at him with a blank look on his face as he is saying to Mr. Appletree in a proud and mischievous tone of voice):  "YES!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree now has a devilish look on his face and is saying in a devilish tone of voice):  "I, suppose just keep on shooting until you run out of ammunition, ehy?"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie now has a proud and mischievous look on his face as he is saying to Mr. Appletree in a devilish tone of voice):  "No, until we run out of Jenkins's, haa, haa, haa, haa, haa, haa, haa, haa.  That's the way it goes!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree now has a look of bewilderment on his face as he is saying to Charlie in a sligthly sarcastic tone of voice):  "YES!"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to LEM McCARTHY:  (As Charlie is now looking a Lem with an evil look on his face as he is now asking Lem in an evil and questionable tone of voice):  "Say, what's the score now, Lem?"

LEM McCARTHY to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Lem is now standing in the doorway of one of the Hillbilly shanties with an evil look on his face as he is saying to Charlie in an evil tone of voice as he is still shooting at the Jenkins's with his double-barrel 12 guage shotgun):  "The McCarthy's are on the Jenkins's backyard line, three down and seven to go."

We now see Charlie McCarthy and Mr. Edgar Albert Appletree watching the feuding with scared and dazzed looks on their faces as a 12 guage shotgun shell has now gone whizzing passed them.

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie has now looked at Mr. Appletree with a proud look on his face as he is saying to Mr. Appletree in a really proud and stammering tone of voice):  "Haa, haa, did you, did, did, you see that?"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE ot CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is now looking at Charlie with a look of dismay on his face as he is saying to Charlie in a worried and questionable tone of voice):  "Why, no?"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is looking at him with a huge smile on his face as he is using a proud tone of voice):  "Did you see the English he put on that bullet?"

MR. EDGAR ALBER APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is now gazzing at the feud with a really scared look on his face as he is saying to Charlie in a really worried voice):  "Why, I don't think so!"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is now in a full blown state of pride as he is saying to Mr. Appletree in a really proudful tone of voice):  "Haa, haa, haa, haa, haa, haa, why, that was a three cushion plate."

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is now happily somewhat getting involved with the feud as he has a mischievous grin on his face as he is saying to Charlie in an upbeat and mischievous tone of voice):  "Is that so?"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie now has a really huge smile of pride on his face as he is explaining to Mr. Appletree with pride about the shotgun shot):  "Yes, why he got Willie on the left, ricocheted off the hen house, got the old man in the rear pocket, haa, haa, haa, haa, that's shootin'!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is now enjoying a tad the feud as Mr. Appletree is looking in the view of the shooting with a slightly wirey smile on his face as he is saying to Charlie in a devilish tone of voice):  "Well, I guess it is!"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is looking at him with a devilish look on his face as he is saying to him in a proud an devilisht tone of voice):  "YES!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree now has a really dumbfounded look on his face as he is saying to Charlie in a worried tone of voice):  "Hup, I've never seen anything like this in my life!"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is looking at him with a really startled look on his face as he is saying to Mr. Appletree in a startled and questionable tone of voice):  "NO!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is now looking at Charlie in a thorough state of dazement as he is using a questionable tone of voice):  "NO?"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is now finally asking him his name, since all this past time before this Charlie has not really known his name as Charlie is asking him in a questionable and polite tone of voice):  "Say, who be you stranger, who be you?"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree now has a look of pride on his face as he is saying to Charlie in a really proud tone of voice):  "Hi, I'm Edgar Albert Appletree!"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is now looking a him with a sheepish look on his face as Charlie is saying to him in a low and sheepish tone of voice):  "Is that so?"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is now looking at the ground with a slightly embarrassed look on his face as he is saying to Charlie in an embarrased sort of voice):  "YES!"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is looking at him with a devilish grin on his face as he is saying to him in a mischievous tone of voice):  "Unh, unh, let me tell you something 'Mr. Applestrudle, Applesauce, Applecidre, Apple......?"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is now looking at Charlie with a mad look on his face as he is now shouting at Charlie with a mad and disgusted tone of voice):  "Appletree, Appletree, Appletree!"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie now has a mischievous grin on his face as he is saying to Mr. Appletree in a mischievous tone of voice):  "YES?!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is now finally also learning his name now asks him in a very polite tone of voice as Mr. Appletree is now using a polite tone of voice):  "And, your name?"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie has a huge mischievous smile on his face and is answering in a really mischievous, questionable and slightly stammering tone of voice):  "McCarthy, McCarthy, McCarthy, haa, haa, haa, haa, haa, haa.  Say, whata, whata, you messin' around here for?"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is looking at him in mazement as he is saying to him in a serious voice):  "I'm not messing around?"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is looking at him with a look of wonderment on his face as he is saying to him in a perplexed tone of voice):  "Oh, you're not?"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree now has a look of bewilderment on hsi face as he is saying to Charlie in a sarcastic tone of voice):  "No, I'm down here for my nerves!"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is looking at him with a worried look on his face as he is saying to him in a low and carrying tone of voice):  "For your nerves?"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is looking at Charlie with a quizzical look on his face as he is saying to him in a worried voice):  "YES!"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is looking at him with a mischievous look on his face as he is using a mischievous tone of voice):  "Well, aaah, I see, are they here?"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree has a look of perplexness on his face as he is explaining to Charlie in a serious tone of voice):  "No, what I mean, is, I'm down here for a rest."

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is looking at him with a really worried look on his face as he is saying to him in a low and carrying tone of voice):  "A rest?"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is looking at Charlie with a gazzed look on his face as he is saying to him in a quizzical tone of voice):  "YES!"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie now has a really sad and worried look on his face as he is saying to him in a really friendly and carrying voice):  "You mean you're tired?"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is looking at Charlie in dazement as Mr. Appletree to Charlie in a dazed voice):  "Well, yes, no!"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie how has a look of bewilderment on his face as he is saying to him in a mischievous tone of voice):  "Unh, unh, well make up your mind, haa, haa, haa, haa, haa, haa!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is looking at Charlie with a devious look on his face as he is explaining to Charlie in a serious tone of voice):  "No, I'm just down here to get things off of my mind!"

Right here we see Charlie looking at Mr. Appletree with a serious look on his face as Mr. Appletree now has a look of panic on his face as his hat has now been shot off of the top of his head from the feuding McCarthy's and Jenkins's.

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is looking at Mr. Appletree with a mischievous look on his face as he is saying to him in a mischievous tone of voice):  "Haa, haa, haa, haa, well, that's service, it's off!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As he is now looking at Charlie with a look of panice as he is saying to him in a panicking tone of voice):  "Yes, I see!"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is now looking in the direction of the feuding with a mad look on his face as he is saying to Mr. Appletree in a devilish tone of voice):  "Yes, will you excuse me, while I return the courtesy?"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree now has a look of panic on his face as he is saying to Charlie in a panicking and questionable tone of voice):  "What are you going to do?"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie now has a really devious look on his face as he is saying to Mr. Appletree in a really evil tone of voice):  "I'm gonna kill a neighbour!" 

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is now looking at Charlie with a horrified look of fear on his face as he is saying to Charlie in a scared and loving tone of voice):  "Wait a minute, wait a minute baby, you don't mean to say you're gonna shoot a Jenkins?  Don't you know "THE GOOD BOOK" says you should love 'em!"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is now looking at him with a really wicked look on his face as he is saying to him in a really wicked tone of voice):  "Yeah, yeah, we love 'em, we love to kill 'em, haa, haa, haa, haa, haa, haa, haa, haa!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is now looking at Charlie with a really hurtful look on his face as he is saying to him in a really hurtful tone of voice):  "Well, suppose they should kill one of you McCarthy's?"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie now has a mean look on his face as he is using a wicked and slightly mischievous tone of voice):  "Well, we raised plenty, we got some extras.  I got two brothers named Ed!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is now looking at Charlie with a really dazed look on his face as he is saying to Charlie with a really dazed look on his face as he is saying to Charlie in a questionable tone of voice):  "You don't say?"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is looking at Mr. Appletree with a mischievous look on his face as he is saying to Mr. Appletree in a mischievous voice):  "YES!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is looking at Charlie with a look of puzzlement on his face as he is saying to Charlie in a questionable tone of voice):  "Well, how's that?"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is looking at him with a mischievous look on his face as he is using a slightly sarcastic tone of voice):  "Well, my old man just figures that two 'ED'S' are better than one!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is looking at Charlie with a dazed look on his face as he is saying to Charlie in a quizzical tone of voice):  "I see!"

We now hear the ringing of a bell that now summons for the feuding to temporarily come to a hault to partake in the noontime vittles where we see Charlie and Mr. Appletree looking in the direction of the ringing bell where we now see a fat Hillbilly lady, named Ma McCarthy.  Disgustingly filthy in appearance wearing really dirty house dress and smoking a corn cob pipe.  She looks like herself and her clothing has not seen the inside of a shower or washins' machine for a year.  We also see a long table that is dirty, the wood is thoroughly decade and falling off and leaning badly from rot.  There are really filthy serving wear bowls filled with vittles.  Plus now for a moment there is peace in the feuding as we see the Jenkins's and McCarthy's {what is left of them}, coming to the table, some of them are wearing really filthy and torn white underwear shirts, beat out, dirty, torn dungarees.  Some are wearing disgustingly filthy white dress style shirts, and trousers that are torn badly with vests and all are wearing suspenders and they and their clothing looks like they ain't see a shower or washins' machine in a couple of years.

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is now looking at Charlie with a perplexed look on his face as he is asking Charlie in a slightly stammering and questionable tone of voice):  "Well, well, what, what, what, is that?"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is now looking at Mr. Appletree with a devilish look on his face as he is saying to him in a serious and stammering  tone of voice):  "Thank-you, that's, that's, vittle time!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is now looking at Charlie with a look of bewilderment on his face as he is asking Charlie in a questionable voice):  "Vittle time?"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie now has a look of mischief on his face as he is saying to Mr. Appletree in a mischievous tone of voice):  "YES!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is now looking at Charlie with a sheepish look on his face as Mr. Appletree is saying to Charlie in a fancy folks style of voice):  "Oh, I see, do you mean to tell me that you cease hostility to partake of nourishment?"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is now looking at Mr. Appletree with a mischievous look on his face as he is saying to Mr. Appletree in a mischievous voice):  "Well, no, we just stop shootin' to eat, haa, haa, haa, haa, haa, haa!"

We are now once again on Ma McCarthy as she is ringing the bell for the second time as she is still smoking her corn cob pipe.

MA McCARTHY:  (As Ma McCarthy has now taken her corn cob pipe from her dirty mouth as she is now shouting in a loud and mad tone of voice to the feuding clans):  "Come and get it!"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is now looking at him with a quizzical look on his face as he is saying to Mr. Appletree in a carrying and slightly stammering voice):  "Well, come on, let's, let's go and eat!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree has now noticed the very filthy Ma McCarthy and her corn cob pipe and the disgustingly filthy table settings and the dirty bowls of vittles as Mr. Appletree is now saying to Charlie is a polite tone of voice):  "Well, I don't think I care for any lunch."

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is now looking at Mr. Appletree with a mischievous look on his face as he is saying to Mr. Appletree in a mischievous tone of voice):  "No, come on, you might as well work on down some ears."

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is looking at Charlie with a worried look on his face as he is saying to Charlie in a polite tone of voice):  "No, no, no, thank-you!"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is now looking at Mr. Appletree with a dazed look on his face as Charlie is saying to him in a mischievous tone of voice):  "Well, you don't wanna get shot on an empty stomach do ya?"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is looking at Charlie with a scared look on his face as he is saying to Charlie in a scared voice):  "Umnh, umnh, well, well, I'd rather stay here!"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie now has a look of devilment on his face as he is saying to Mr. Appletree in a wise crack tone of voice):  "Yeah, well, you might just as well come down there and get full of food as to sit here and get full of lead!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is looking at Charlie with a really dazed look on his face as he is saying to Charlie in a scared voice):  "Yeah!"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is looking at him with a sarcastic look on his face as Charlie is saying to Mr. Appletree in a sarcastic voice):  "YES!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree now has a look of panic on his face as he is saying to Charlie in a worried tone of voice):  "Yeah, maybe you're right!"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is looking at Mr. Appletree with a mischievous look on his face as he is using a mischievous tone of voice):  "Yeah!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is now looking at Charlie with a happy look on his face as he is patting Charlie on the shoulder and is saying to Charlie in a gleeful tone of voice):  "Well, maybe you're right, I, I, believe I will go with you, if you don't mind?"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is smiling happily at Mr. Appletree and is saying in a really joyful tone of voice):  "Yeah, sure, yeah!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is looking at Charlie happily as he is saying to Charlie in a gleeful voice):  "All right!"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie has a happy look on his face as he is saying to him in a happy voice):  "Yeah, sure!"

We now see the two Hillbilly Clans gathering together to partake in vittles as they are now hanging up their shot guns.  We also see a score board with the count of how many Jenkins's and McCarthy's that have now bitten the dust.

LEM McCARTHY to PA McCARTHY:  (As Lem is now handing him his shot gun as Lem has a mad look on his face and is using a mad tone of voice):  "Keep mine at the right, now!"

PA McCARTHY:  (As Pa has a look of madness on his face as he is shouting in a mad tone of voice):  "Come on boys, cheque your weapons here, don't want no shootin' durnin' eatin'."

We now see Clem McCarthy handing his shot gun over to Pa McCarthy as he is now getting ready to partake in vittles.

A JENKINS to PA McCARTHY:  (As the Jenkins is now looking at Pa with a serious look on his face as he is saying to him in a friendly tone of voice as he is now chequing in his shot gun):  "Howdy, Lem!"

MA McCARTHY to HER SIDE of the CLANS:  (As she is standing there with a blank look on her face as she is now counting mischievously ONE-TWO-THREE-FOUR-FIVE-SIX-SEVEN-EIGHT-NINE-TEN.  Ten empty plates.  Seven Jenkins's and three McCarthy's.  Haa, you're doin' much better than you did last year, haa, hunh, haa, hunh, haa, hunh, haa, hunh, haa, hunh, haa, hunh!"

PA McCARTHY to MA McCARTHY:  (As Pa is waving a hand at her in mischief as he has a mischievous look on his face and is using a mischievous voice):  "Hunh, that they ain't even warmed up yet!"

MA McCARTHY to THE TWO FEUDIN' CLANS:  (As she now has a serious look on her face as she now has clapped her hands together and shouts loudly):  "Come on, get going!"

We now se two really dirty McCarthy's going for bowls of vittles, Lem and Clem.  We are now back on Charlie and Mr. Appletree as his sister is now joining them.

BROTHER EDGAR to HIS SISTER:  (As he is looking at her with a sweet smile on his face as he is stating to her in a kind tone of voice):  "Here's a place right here for ya!"

MISS APPLETREE to HER BROTHER EDGAR:  (As she is now looking at her brother with a really sweet smile on her face as she is saying to him in a polite tone of voice as she is now sitting down):  "Thank-you!"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MISS APPLETREE:  (As Charlie has a flirtatious look on his face and is saying to her in a polite and flirtatious voice):  "Yes mame, right here's a place!"

MISS APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As she is now looking at Charlie in a really kind way as she is saying to Charlie in a really sweet and polite voice):  "Thank-you!"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MISS APPLETREE:  (As Charlie still has that flirty look on his face as he is saying to her in a polite and flirty tone of voice):  "Yes, indeedy, haa, haa, haa, haa, haa, haa!"

MISS APPLETREE to HER BROTHER EDGAR:  (As she is looking at him with a dazed look on her face as she is asking Edgar in a questionable tone of voice):  "Tell me Edgar, what was all the shooting about?"

BROTHER EDGAR to HIS SISTER:  (As he and Charlie are now looking at her with a serious look on their faces as he is saying to her in a mischievous tone of voice):  "Oh, the shooting, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh!"

MISS APPLETREE to HER BROTHER EDGAR:  (As she is looking at him with a quizzical look on her face as she is asking him in a questionable tone of voice):  Was it target practice?"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MISS APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is looking at her with a serious look on his face as he is saying to her in a polite and slighty mischievous tone of voice):  Unh, yes Mame, it was an elimination contest!"

MISS APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As she is looking at Charlie with a worried look on her face as she is asking Charlie in a worried and questionable tone of voice):  "Elimination contest?"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MISS APPLETREE:  (As Charlie has a look of devilish mischievous on his face and is using a mischievous tone of voice):  "Yeah!"

MISS APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Miss Appletree is now looking at Charlie with a worried look and is asking Charlie in a worried and questionable voice):  "Eliminating what?"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MISS APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is looking at her with a mischievous look and is answering her in a mischievous tone of voice):  "Jenkins's!"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is now looking at Mr. Appletree with a devious look on his face as he is saying to Mr. Appletree mischievously):  "Hunh?"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is looking at Charlie with a look of mischief as he responds back in a mischievous voice):  "YES!"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is looking at Mr. Appletree mischievously and is whispering to him in a low and mischievous voice):  "Yes, indeed, daa, daa, daa, daa, daa, daa.  Say, I figure you'd give me a knock down to the dame!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is pointing a finger at his sister and is saying to Charlie in a low and serious voice):  "Oh, you mean?"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie now has a quizzical look on his face as he is using a low and mischievous voice):  "YES!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLTREE to HIS SISTER:  (As Mr. Appletree is looking at his sister with a polite look on his face as he is saying to her in a polite tone of voice):  "Oh, yes, oh, Miss Appletree, enh, this is Mr. McCarthy!"

MISS APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Miss Appletree is now sweetly patting Charlie on his shoulder as she is saying to him in a sweet and polite voice):  "Hunh, haa.  You are a nice little boy, aren't you?"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MISS APPLETREE:  (As Charlie now has a really happy look on his face as he is using a happy tone of voice):  "Haa, haa, haa, haa, haa, haa, haa, haa, hoo, hoo, hoo, hoo, hoo, hoo, hoo, hoo, hoo!"

We now see Charlie burying his face into Mr. Appletree's shoulder in a state of love and slight embarrassment.

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie has now recovered from his state of embarrassment as Charlie is looking at Mr. Appletree with a quizzical look and is now asking him quietly):  "Taa, taa, taa, taa, taa, taa, oh, my, my, my, my, unh, did you say Miss or Mrs.?"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is now looking at Charlie with a serious look on his face as he is whispering to Charlie in a low voice):  MISS!"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is now in love and is looking at him mischievously as Charlie is using a mischievous voice):  "Hunh, that's all I wanna know!"

Charlie is now looking at Miss Appletree with a lovey-dovey goo-goo eyes look as he tried to start a conversation with her):  "Enh, enh, hem, hem!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is now tugging on Charlie's shirt sleeve as Mr. Appletree is looking at Charlie with a dismay look on his face as he is asking Charlie in a questionable voice):  "Hunh, suppose I said Mrs., then what?"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is now looking at Mr. Appletree with a devilish look on his face as Charlie is saying to Mr. Appletree in a mischievous voice):  "Well, unh, I'd have to work different that's all!"

We now see Miss Appletree looking at the McCarthy's and the Jenkins's as she is now helping herself to some vittles.

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MISS APPLETREE:  (As Charlie has a full blown look of love on his face as he is saying to Miss Appletree in a flirty tone of voice):  "Daa, daa, daa, daa, daa, daa, enhem, enhem, enhem, enhem, enhem!.  Have you anything on for this evening?"

MISS APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Miss Appletree is looking at Charlie politely and says to him in a polite tone of voice):  "Why, no, not a thing!"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MISS APPLETREE:  (As Charlie now has a mischievous look on his face as he is laughingly saying to her in a mischievous voice):  "No, aren't you afraid you'll catch cold?  Ehe, taa, taa, taa, taa, taa, taa.  Well, enh, what would you like to eat?"

MISS APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Miss Appletree is looking to the direction ot the vittles and is saying to Charlie in a serious voice):  "I think, I'd like some pigs feet!"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MISS APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is looking at her with a puzzled look on his face as Charlie is saying to her in a questionable voice):  "Some what!?"

MISS APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Miss Appletree is now looking at Charlie with a look of dismay on her face as she is saying to Charlie in a devilish tone of voice):  "Pigs feet!"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MISS APPLETREE:  (As Charlie now has a look of dumbfoundedness on his face as he is using a super questionable voice):  "Some, what????"

MISS APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Miss Appletree now has a slight mad look on her face as she is shouting to Charlie in a slight mad voice):  "Pigs feet, pigs feet, you know, feet, feet, {Here we now see Miss Appletree pointing to one of her feets}.

We now see Charlie really in a deep state of love, as Charlie is saying, 'whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa,' as he has just looked at her beautiful foot.

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is head over heels in love with Miss Appletree as Charlie is whispering to Mr. Appletree in a low and serious voice):  "Daa, daa, daa, daa, it's okay, hunh?  I'd like to be around when se ordures frogs legs!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is now trying to cool Charlie down a bit is looking at Charlie with a worried look on his face as he is saying to him in a carrying tone of voice):  "Now, now, now, you're getting to be a fresh boy!"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is looking at Mr. Appletree with a look of playfulness on his face as he is saying in a playful tone of voice):  "No, not fresh, just anxious!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is now looking at Charlie devilishly as he is saying to Charlie in a low mischievous tone of voice):  "Hunh, yes!?"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is looking at Mr. Appletree mischievously as he is using a mischievous voice):  "Well, uhnh, yes!"

MISS APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY and HER BROTHER EDGAR:  (As Miss Appletree now has slammed her hand down hard on the table as she has a demented look on her face as she is now shouting at them in a really high pitched, demented tone of voice as she has now noticed the dirty hillbilly clans and their 'SCORE BOARD').  "I see what this is, I know what all the shooting's been about, there's a feud going on here and I think it's simply terrible!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to HIS SISTER:  (As Mr. Appletree now has a look of sadness on his face as he is saying to her in a low and sad tone of voice):  "Well, so do I."

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As he is looking at Charlie with a paingul look on his face as he is asking Charlie in a hurtful tone of voice):  "What, do you think?"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is looking at Mr. Appletree with an evil look on his face as he is saying to him in a dveilish and questionable tone of voice):  "Unh, haa, what do I think of what?"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is looking at Charlie with a really hurt look as Mr. Appletree is asking Charlie in a hurtful voice):  "Oh, my sisters psychology?"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is now looking at het with goo-goo eyes and a look of flirt on his face as Charlie is saying to Mr. Appletree in a flirty tone of voice as Charlie is looking at her form):  "Well, I ehy, I ehy, taa, taa, I think it's a very nice psychology, a very cute psychology."

MISS APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY and HER BROTHER EDGAR:  (As Miss Appletree is now looking at the two of them with a really mad look on her face as she is shouting at them in a really mean voice):  "I'm speaking about this feud.  In this day and age people don't go around shooting one another.  Well, if they had schools down here, this sort of thing wouldn't happen!"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MISS APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is now looking at her with a look of wonderment on his face as he is saying to her in a dazed voice):  "YES!"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is looking at Mr. Appletree with a look of perplexness on his face as he is saying to Mr. Appletree in a dazed voice):  "Hey, did you, did you, did you, go to school?"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is now looking at Charlie with a carrying look on his face as he is saying to Charlie in a serious voice):  "Why, certainly, I studied under my grand-father."

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is looking at him eagerly and is saying to him in an eager voice):  "Yeah, yes!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is now looking at Charlie with a serious look on his face as he is using a polite tone of voice):  "Yes, Doctor Appletree!"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie now has a look of mischief on his face as he is saying to him in a mischievous tone of voice):  "Oh, I see, under the 'Old Appletree'."

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is now looking at Charlie with a slight laugh on his face as he is saying to Charlie laughingly):  "YES!"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is looking at Mr. Appletree with a look of mischief on his face as he is saying to Mr. Appletree in a serious tone of voice):  "You know, I go to school too?"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is looking at Charlie with a dazed look on his face as he is saying to Charlie in a perplexed and questionalable voice):  "You do?"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie now has a look of happiness on his face as Charlie is saying to Mr. Appletree in a happy tone of voice):  "Yes, I got my report card right here!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is looking at Charlie with a happy look on his face as he is taking Charlie's report card for his hand and is saying to him in a questionable tone of voice):  "Is this it?"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie has a huge smile on his face as he is saying to Mr. Appletree in a gleeful tone of voice):  "YES!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is now looking at Charlie with a carrying look on his face and is asking Charlie in a polite and questionable tone of voice):  "Do you mind if I look at it?"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie has a look of wonderment on his face as Charlie is saying to Mr. Appletree happily):  "No, go right ahead!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree has a surprised look on his face as he is saying to Charlie in a surprised tone of voice):  "Well say, and this is a report card!"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is looking at Mr. Appletree gleefully and has a happy tone of voice):  "YES!"

We now see Miss Appletree with a smile on her face.  Charlie has a look of happiness on his face as Mr. Appletree has a look of bewilderment on his as the three of them are now looking at Charlie's report card.  As Mr. Appletree is now reading off Charlie's grades...... 'D-D-D-D'.

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is looking at Charlie with a mad look on his face as he is saying to Charlie in a sad and carrying tone of voice):  "Haa, haa, that's terrible!"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie has a mischievous look on his face and is using a mischievous tone of voice and is laughing slightly):  "Well, ehy, at least it is consistent!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is now looking at Charlie with a quizzical look on his face as he is saying to Charlie in a mad and slightly laughing tone of voice):  "Yeah, haa, haa, haa, haa, haa, haa, haa, haa, that's about all!"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie has a perplexed look on his face and is using a perplexed tone of voice):  "Yes, yes!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree and his Sister are now looking at Charlie's report card as Mr. Appletree is asking Charlie in a questionable voice):  "What is the first D for?"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie now has a worried look on his face as he is using a mischievous tone of voice):  "Taa, taa, well, that means, eny, that means Detour?"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is now looking at Charlie in a total state of dazement as Mr. Appletree is saying to Charlie in a questionable voice):  "Detour?"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie now has a mischievous smile on his face as Charlie is saying to Mr. Appletree in a mischievous tone of voice):  "Yeah!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree now has a sad look on his face as Mr. Appletree is using a sad voice):  "Oh, I see!"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie still has his mischief look on his face as he is answering Mr. Appletree in a mischievous tone of voice):  "See, if I couldn't answer a question, I'd find a way around it!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is looking at Charlie with a look of dumbfoundedness on his face as he is saying to Charlie in a worried tone of voice):  "Yes, I see!"

MISS APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Miss Appletree now has a surprised look on her face as she is now pointing at one of the 'D's' as she is asking Charlie in a questionable tone of voice):  "And what is this 'D' in spelling for?"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MISS APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is now looking at the report card and is answering her in a mischievous tone of voice):  "Well, you know, the teacher and I, she was wrong and I was right!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is looking at Charlie with a worried look on his face as he is saying to Charlie in a carrying and perplexed tone of voice):  "I see, she didn't know how!"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is laughing mischievously and is saying to him in a devilish voice):  "Yeah, yeah, that's it.  Why, I could spell words that she couldn't pronounce."

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree now has a look of question on his face as he is asking Charlie in a questionable voice):  "I'll bet you can!"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is looking at Mr. Appletree mischievously and is saying to him in a mischievous tone of voice):  "Yes, Sir!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is looking at Charlie mischievously and is now testing Charlie's spelling skills is asking Charlie seriously):  "Yes, how do you spell, enha, 'S-P-I-N-A-C-H'.!

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is now looking at Mr. Appletree with a dazed but yet slightly mischievous look as Charlie is now saying to Mr. Appletree in a low and mischievous tone of voice):  "Spinach?"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree now has a look of wonderment on his face and is using a sorry state of voice):  "YES!"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie has a look of puzzlement on his face as he is now using a mischievous tone of voice as he is now beating around the bush to his question due to the face Charlie does not know how to spell 'S-P-I-N-A-C-H'):  "taa, enh, wrong!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree now has a gazzed look on his face as he is saying to Charlie in a dumbfounded tone of voice):  "Yeah, that's what I thought!"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie has a devilish look on his face and is using a mischievous tone of voice as he is saying to Mr. Appletree):  "Yes, well, I'm glad I can't spell spinach!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree now has a really worried look on his face as he is stating in a questionable tone of voice):  "You are?"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is looking at Mr. Appletree with a mischievous twinkle in his eye as he is saying to Mr. Appletree in a devilish voice):  "Yes, because I don't like it, and I'm glad I don't like it too, because if I liked it I'd eat it and I hate the darn stuff, haa, haa, haa, haa, haa, haa!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Apppletree is looking at Charlie with a playful mischievous look on his face as he is slightly smiling and is saying to Charlie in a mischievous tone of voice):  "I see, Hodgious!"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is looking at Mr. Appletree mischievously and is saying to Mr. Appletree in a mischievous tone of voice):  "YES!" 

All the while that Charlie and Mr. Appletree are having their discussion about Charlie's report card we see Miss Appletree sitting there smiling gleefully.

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is still examining Charlie's report card as he now has a look of dismay on his face as he is asking Charlie in a questionable tone of voice):  "Well, what is this 'D' in arithmetic for?"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie now has a look of shame on his face as he is saying to Mr. Appletree in a low and slightly mischievous voice):  "Well, it's just a 'D', that's all!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is looking at Charlie with a a look of wonderment on his face as he is saying to Charlie in a sad tone of voice):  "Well, you must be pretty bad!"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie now has a sad look on his face as he is saying to Mr. Appletree in a sad tone of voice):  "Yes, I am!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is looking at Charlie with a quizzical look on his face as he is asking Charlie a math test in a questionable tone of voice):  "I bet you can't even add six and four?"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is looking at Mr. Appletree mischievously and is saying to him in a mischievous tone of voice):  "Say, what are you trying to do, insult my stupidity with your intelligence, hunh?"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MISS APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is looking at her in dismay as she is smiling at Charlie sweetly as Charlie is mumbling to her i a low voice):  "I guess I told him!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is looking at Charlie with a playful grin on his face as he is asking Charlie in a laughing tone of voice):  "Well, how much is six and four?"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is now looking at Mr. Appletree with a scared look on his face as he is saying to him in a scared tone of voice):  "Well, enh, six and four?"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is looking at Charlie with a mischievous look on his face as he is now saying to Charlie in a quizzical tone of voice):  "YES!"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is looking at Mr. Appletree with a dazed glare as he is answering him in a mischievous tone of voice):  "Why, it's, it's, why, it's, it's, well, it's around eleven or twelve or so!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is now glaring at Charlie with a mean stare as he is shouting meanly at Charlie):  "How much?"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is looking at Mr. Appletree with a blank stare as he is saying to him in a scared, but slightly mischievous voice):  "Henh, henh?"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is now looking at Charlie with a carrying look on his face as he is saying to him in a friendly tone of voice):  "Why, no, no, no!"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie has a surprised look on his face as he is saying to Mr. Appletree in a questionable voice):  "NO!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is looking at Charlie with a carrying look on his face as he is now politely and kindly helping Charlie with the arithmetic test):  "No, six and four is ten!"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is looking at Mr. Appletree with a happy look and is grinning happily as he is saying to him in a mischievous tone of voice):  "Yeah!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is looking at Charlie with a look of dismay on his face as he is saying to Charlie in a worried voice):  "YES!"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is now shaking his head to and fro in madness as he is saying to Mr. Appletree in a mad and mischievous voice):  ""Nawh, nawh, no, no, no, five and five is ten!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is looking at Charlie with a mischievous look on his face as he says to Charlie in a mischievous voice):  "Oh, oh, haa, haa, haa, haa!"

All the while that Charlie and Mr. Appletree were having their arithmetic testings betwixt one another, Miss Appletree is sitting there smiling and laughing happily.

MISS APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Miss Appletree now has a look of bewilderment on her face as she is now pointing at one of Charlie's 'D's' and is asking him in a questionable tone of voice):  "And, look, look, at that 'D' for Deportment!"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MISS APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is looking at his report card with a look of wonderment as he is shaking his head out of sadness and is saying in a sad tone of voice):  "Yeah, taa, taa, taa, ain't it, ain't it, disgustin', and I was the best one in the class too."

MISS APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Miss Appletree is looking at Charlie with a look of dismay on her face as she is asking Charlie in a worried and questionable tone of voice):  "Then why did you get the words wrong?"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MISS APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is now with a look of puzzlement on his face as he is saying to her in a mischievous tone of voice):  "I was in a class by myself!"

We are now on the table full of vittles as we are now seeing the two dirty Hillbilly clans.  As Miss Appletree, Charlie and Mr. Appletree are looking at them with worried looks on their faces.

LEM McCARTHY to the REST of HIS CLAN:  (As Lem is sitting there in a disgustingly filthy white shirt, dirty neckkerchief, dirty hair and beard ans smoking a stogie as he is saying in a state of pride):  "I'm sure glad old Abner got bumped off this morning, haa, haa, haa, haa, haa, haa, or else I wouldn't of had this second helpin'."

{CALLING ALL SHEMP-A-HOLICS LIKE MYSELF, PLEASE DO NOT SNEEZE, FALL ASLEEP, RUB YOUR EYES, OR YAWN.  BECAUSE IF YOU DO DO YOU WILL MISS IT.  THIS IS THE ONLY MINASUCLE PART ON THE SHORT THAT SAMUEL IS IN.  THE NINE PARAGRAPHS WITH THE ◊ BY THEM ARE HIS PART}:

◊ CLEM McCARTHY to the REST OF HIS CLAN and THE JENKINS'S:  (As Clem is sitting there filthy beyond no end and is saying with a mouthful of vittles):  "This food do be good."

◊ JACK McCARTHY to CLEM McCARTHY:  (As Jack is sitting there looking at Clem with a disgusted look on his face as he is saying to Clem in a mad tone of voice):  "Aaah, Clem, roast is best!"

◊ CLEM McCARTHY to JACK McCARTHY:  (As Clem now has a disgusted look on his face and is shouting back at him in a disgusted tone of voice):  "No it tain't, it's better boiled!"

◊ JACK McCARTHY to CLEM McCARTHY:  (As Jack now has a mean look on his face as he is shouting at Clem in a wicked tone of voice):  "I say roast!"

◊ CLEM McCARTHY to JACK McCARTHY:  (As Clem now has an evil look on his face at Jack as he is now slamming his fist down on the table out of madness as he is shouting at Jack in utter madness):  "And, I still says boiled!"

◊ JACK McCARTHY to CLEM McCARTHY:  (As Jack is now in a full blown state of disgust as he is looking at Clem wickedly and is shouting at him in an evil tone of voice):  "Roast!"

◊ CLEM McCARTHY to JACK McCARTHY:  (As Clem is now thoroughly disgusted and shouts to him in an evil tone of voice):  "Boiled!"

◊ JACK McCARTHY to CLEM McCARTHY:  (As Jack now has a worried look on his face as he is now looking at another member of his Clan with a disgusted look on his face as he states about the roast or boiled problem):  "Well, why don't we leave it up to Barney.  Barney whats you think tastes the best, roast ham or boiled ham?"

◊ BARNEY McCARTHY to CLEM and JACK McCARTHY:  (As Barney is now sitting there shurgging his shoulders and has a look of bewilderment on his face as he is saying to Jack and Clem in a polite tone of voice):  "Well, I'll tell you, by me, bot, is the same!"

{THIS CONCLUDES THE PORTION OF THE SHORT THAT SAMUEL HORWITZ WAS IN AS CLEM McCARTHY}

We now see Charlie, Miss Appletree and Mr. Appletree looking at the Clans as they are having their discussion about ham cookins' with looks of disgust on their faces.

CHARLIE McCARTHY to the CLANS:  (As Charlie now has a look of puzzlement on his face as he is saying in a hungry tone of voice):  "Hey, how about some beans and potatoes and stuff down here!"

We are now getting one final glimpse of the Two Clans, a close-up on Clem McCarthy finishing up vittles as we see Ma McCarthy standing behind them with a mean look on her face as she is holding a coffee pot.

MA McCARTHY to the TWO FEUDIN' CLANS:  (As Ma McCarthy is now looking at them with a mad look on her face as she is now shouting at them in a mean tone of voice):  "Lunch is over, get your guns, come on, hurry up!"

We now see the two dirty clans getting up from the noon-day vittles and are getting their shot guns to partake in round two of that day's feudin'.

Miss Appletree is now watching the Clans get their shot guns and are now getting ready for more feudin' with a hurtful look on her face.

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is now looking at the empty plates with a look of wonderment on his face as he is saying in a dazed tone of voice):  "Say, what is this, that didn' take long did it?"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is looking at Charlie with a carrying look on his face as he is stating to Charlie in a carrying tone of voice):  "No, but I'm not hungry!"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is looking at Mr. Appletree with a concerned look on his face as Charlie is saying to him in a concerned voice):  "You can wait to supper?"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is in a carrying manner as he is saying to Charlie politely):  "Oh, yes, yes, yes, yes!"

MISS APPLETREE to HER BROTHER EDGAR:  (As Miss Appletree is now getting up from the dilapidated table as she has a hurtful look on her face as she is saying in a sad tone of voice):  "Edgar, I'm going in and laying down for a bit!"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MISS APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is now watching her exit with a lovey-dovey look on his face as Charlie is saying to her in a sweet tone of voice):  "Unh ha!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to HIS SISTER:  (As Mr. Appletree is looking at her with a polite look on his face as he is saying to her in a polite tone of voice):  "That'll be all right dear, yes!"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MISS APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is looking at her with a happy look on his face as he is saying to her in a cheerful tone of voice):  "I'll see ya later, I'll dig my geetar, haa, haa, haa, haa, haa, haa, haa, haa, taa, taa, taa, taa, taa, taa, taa, taa, cute kid, hunh?"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is looking at Charlie with a mischievous grin as his is saying to Charlie in a mischievous voice):  "YES!"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie has a look of love on his face as he is watching Miss Appletree walking to her shantie says to him in a low and mischievous tone of voice):  "Yes, cute kid, yes, cute kid!"

We are now back the the feud where we are hearing shot guns shooting as we are looking at a really delapidated out-house, as Clem McCarthy is now standing by the left side of the out-house with his 12 guage double-barrel shot gun.

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is still sitting at the table with Charlie as he now has a really worried look on his face as he is asking Charlie in a sad and worried tone of voice):  "Say, how long do they keep shooting at each other?"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is looking at Mr. Appletree mischievously and is saying to him in a mischievous tone of voice):  "Hunh,?  Well last year we worked on eight hour shifts!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is looking at Charlie with a really painful look on his face as he is saying to Charlie in a painful tone of voice):  "You did?"

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie is now looking at Mr. Appletree in a look of dismay as he is saying to Mr. Appletree hurtfully):  "Yes, this year, we're splitting, four, three!"

MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE to CHARLIE McCARTHY:  (As Mr. Appletree is looking at Charlie with a perplexed look on his face as he is saying to Charlie in a worried tone of voice):  "Oh, I understand!?"

END OF THE SHORT:

The feud is still in full blown progress as we are now seeing a close-up on Charlie McCarthy.

CHARLIE McCARTHY to MR. EDGAR ALBERT APPLETREE:  (As Charlie has a puzzled look on his face as he is saying to Mr. Appletree in a serious tone of voice):  "Taa, taa, that's right, that's right, gotta expect that sorta thing you know, it's life!"





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